Ah, spring is finally upon us. Leave behind the cold weather, snow and frozen toes, and let the sun and warmth resurrect you. With the onset of brighter days, I went for my first outdoor run. As I was trudging through muddy ground, I instantly got a smile on my face. You see, once spring hits, I’m like a dog out of its cage. Another phenomena of the coming of spring is the fact that all the beautiful women that sheltered themselves all winter, all of a sudden appear. Out and about with their gal pals, whether it’s a casual lunch and shopping extravaganza or a night out on the town, they are dressed and ready to impress. So make yourself a mango margarita, pretend it’s vacation time on an island surrounded by beauty and, of course, enjoy Drinks with Jess.
Now, I do believe every woman is beautiful, however, what I am talking about here are the especially magnificent physical specimens that you rarely come across. The ones that on first sight make you sweat, tongue-tied, and afraid. It’s like you lose all confidence around these women, but right here, right now, I’m going to uncover the great mystery of these beauties so that you don’t have to be afraid to approach them.
Now, they may have their looks, know it and capitalize on it, but that doesn’t make them better than you. And to be quite honest, they hate being treated like a trophy or like they’re perfect, so don’t do it! Looks can only get them so far and they may not have anything else to bring to the table. If you are confident in yourself and know how amazing you are, then this shouldn’t hinder your approach.
They may be alone or out with the girls. They may appear to be pretentious, stuck up or clicky. Most of them aren’t, but there are always exceptions. But one thing to remember is that we are all human beings. We’ve all had good and bad experiences and we’ve all had our insecurities. Think about it, every woman wants to find a good partner, but beautiful women also deal with being approached or only liked for their looks. Because of this, they may feel jaded or even insecure because they know that there is more to them than that, but don’t believe people care that they have substance. They have real feelings, goals and the same “not good enough” issues that any other woman has.
Like any other woman, they want someone with good character, someone confident in themselves, and by all means, someone who holds their own. They want someone who wants to get to know them as a person and see past their looks. Think about it, don’t unattractive people feel the same way? I constantly hear both the attractive and unattractive say “I wish they could see how great of a person I am and actually give me a chance.” So with this in mind, approach them because you want to talk to them in order to see what kind of person they are, not because they’re hot. And don’t be off struck if they roll their eyes, say “no thanks,” or make snide comment. They are so used to being approached by those who want to just get in their pants, that this is a defense mechanism. If you are authentic and pure, simply wanting to talk to them as a human being without some sleazy ulterior motive, then they will become receptive.
So dear readers, start to get back that positive, playful, spring-like energy. Stop being such a scared baby and start talking to all women… even the astoundingly beautiful ones. I always tend to refer back to a student that I had who made the most profound statement for an 18 year old kid; he said “if all women were beautiful, then we would have to choose them based on their personality and character.” So keep this in mind, all women are beautiful. Start looking at them as human beings, and get ready to tell me some tales next week when you join me for more Drinks with Jess.
Jess is a dating coach, best selling author, and radio personality in Philadelphia. She provides the LGBTQ community with no-nonsense, straight forward advice to understanding your mind in order to navigate the complex dating scene and go after and get the people you desire.